By: Astara van der Jagt
I don’t remember the first time I crawled past my stuffed animals to crack open the door. One? Two? I was too young to know what surviving meant, let alone that I was doing it already.
I only remember the routine. My toys lined up like gentle guards at the end of the bed, small ones in front, big ones in back. Counting them brought comfort. One, two, three… until I was sure they were all still there. Until I could gather the courage to check if she was.
We don’t talk enough about what it means to survive behind closed doors, or what it takes to get out. We talk even less about what it means to watch—and do nothing. The neighbors. The relatives. The doctors who said, “Don’t make him mad.” Even me, the child counting her toys for comfort while praying tomorrow wouldn’t be worse.
So yes, this is why I march.
I march for the children who count bruises instead of sheep. For the mothers too exhausted to cry anymore. For the neighbors still drawing the curtains. For the girls, women, and gender-diverse folks in Ottawa who will never march again because their lives were stolen in acts of femicide. This year alone, our city has lost too many. One is too many.
I march because I survived. And because survival is not the end; it’s the beginning. I found the courage to speak up when no one else would. And now, I ask you to do the same.
If you love a survivor, support them. If you witness abuse, intervene. If you feel afraid to act, imagine what it feels like to live in that fear every single day.
We are all gatekeepers. To healing. To safety. To life.
So, when I march, I’m not just reclaiming the night. I’m reclaiming my voice, my power, my hope. And I’m extending my hand to anyone who still feels trapped in silence.
Join us as we march.
Take Back The Night – Ottawa | Event Details:
Date: Thursday, September 18, 2025
Rally: Minto Park (102 Lewis St) at 6 PM
March: Begins at 6:45 PM through Downtown Ottawa
Accessibility: Accessible bus & ASL/LSQ interpreters provided
